A virtuous woman exudes and inspires joy

 A good woman is genuine, Joyful, virtuous, valuable, competent, ready, kind, benevolent, merciful, hardworking, agreeable, pleasant, congenial, honorable, faithful, gracious, and wise.  

Titus 3:14 "And let ours also learn to maintain good works for necessary uses, that they be not unfruitful." A person is what she does.  So often we want only a portion of our life on stage.  God sees it all, and usually, quite frankly, so do our kids.  It doesn't matter what others think of us, ultimately, it's what God thinks, our husbands experience, and our kids learn from us that matters.

  Lord, I want to be fruitful, guide me today to put my hand to the things that will bring great harvest.  

"A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones." Prov 12:4

A good woman is a crown to her husband.  She can make a mediocre man be as honored as one wearing a crown.

    -She is wise and does not waste her time or their money foolishly by emotional shopping, eating out, or indulging in expensive or extensive entertainment, but rather is a keeper at home, chooses wisely entertainment that honors God, and gifts of value, making his "little money" go a long long way.  As a result, he appears wiser and wealthier than he really is and is looked upon with honor because of it. Her devotion to the Lord and to him brings them both reward.

  -The good wife never shows dishonor to her husband as a father, rather she trains her children to be obedient and resourceful. As a result, he appears to be an attentive and excellent father, and in fact is more able to be because his wife gives him the best opportunities to engage positively with his children.

  -The good woman is submissive and honoring towards her husband even when he appears to be selfish and self-centered, or dishonest, and he in turn treats her with kindness and will be won over.  Holy Spirit will work on him in time and they will be a testimony.  People will look at their relationship, redeemed, and think he must have always been a good man for them to be so happy together.  She takes delight in the positive attention and has no desire to correct them, but rather looks lovingly upon him.

Why would a woman treat her husband so well, even when he is not a crownly man?  Because she realizes she is  his crown, and when he recognizes this he will live the way of the kingdom.  By being a crown to her husband, she is raising children who will rise up and call her blessed.  By being a crown to her husband, she is winning his love and appreciation.  Be being a prudent woman, she is gaining a comfortable place to raise her family  She is doing exactly what God says will cause her husband to come to God.  And most of all, she is bringing honor to God by fulfilling her calling as a help meet.  In the end, people who know her will know the truth: the most important truth, not about her (once struggling) husband, but because her family is a walking testimony; of God's gracious abundance to those who seek Him. 

1 Peter 3:1 "wives, in the same way, submit yourselves to your husbands, (The passion translations says "be devoted") so that even if some of them do not obey the Word of God, they would be won over by your kind conduct, without you even saying a thing."

How is this 'in the same way?"  We are to submit to our husbands in the same way that Christ, as He sought to honor God's call for his life, submitted.  "He did not turn at those who hurled their insults at him, nor retaliate, but suffered without threat.  Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. He bore our sins in his body on the tee, so that we might die to our sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.  For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the shepherd and overseer of your souls."  1 Peter 2:23-25.  

Are we not also called to bear one another's burdens?  We are not so often crucified for the sins of our husbands, but if we will lovingly, with great care, commit to our responsibilities, seek to restore our husbands without following them in sin, we will reap the reward of the Father. Gal 6:2, let's look in the mirror, sisters and fellow help-meets, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.  If anyone thinks she is something when she is nothing she deceives herself.  Each one should test her own actions.  Then she can take pride in herself, without comparing herself to somebody else, for each one should carry her own load."

Aren't we so guilty of comparing ourselves to others, our husbands to other's? What if we just look at our own actions, look at ourselves in the mirror, are we thinking more highly of ourselves then we ought? Take pride in (put your energy into) carrying the load God gives you.  I am so guilty of being convicted and then looking to the left and the right at what others are doing- do I need to correct them? (hence I write a book! Ok, so for real, I'm writing this book because I am so amazed, humbled, and, well feel a little like "duh!", and I want to make sure to help others out there who are struggling so hard, feeling like they're failing and looking flabbergasted at the result of a husband they thought was the ticket to their dream.  Whew- the ticket is not in him, in changing him, or in what he can do, but in submitting yourself to the lordship of Christ, to do what He's called you to do!